After my cat Cosmo died last year, Dave made it clear that he didn’t like the idea of getting another cat. His reasons were good – we already have two dogs and a fish, we live where paralysis ticks are rampant (and one had nearly killed Cosmo a few years prior), and perhaps most significantly, Cosmo was a bit of an arsehole.

Then, towards the end of last year, and quite possibly after an undiagnosed head injury, Dave rang me one afternoon at work and said, appropo of nothing, ‘So, do you want a cat?’.

Someone at his workplace needed to give away their cat, and Dave has a very soft heart, so offered to take it. As it happens, that cat ended up getting a last minute reprieve by its owners, so we were still catless but the seed had been planted. Cat nip, actually.

A few weeks later, our friend Jules, who’s a vet, posted on Facebook looking for someone to take two kittens who’d been found dumped in a box on a school oval. What I think about people who dump defenceless animals in boxes would take up an entire post, and would consist mostly of words like ‘fucking’ and ‘arsehole’, but suffice to say the photo of these two bundles of cute tugged at my heartstrings, and we went to check them out, with the prospect of possibly bringing one home.

We got both.

Meet Lulu:

and Inky:

They enjoy playing with Lego

having mock sword fights with their tails

shooting lasers out of their feet

and licking each other’s backs

But most of all, they enjoy being arseholes.

Cosmo would be so proud.